Homeless-ness In Real Life

Homeless-Ness In Real Life

Residential instability is a disruptive experience for children and families (Fantuzzo, LeBoeuf, Chen,  Rouse, & Culhane, 2012). Unpredictable and undesired moves from one’s home adversely affect the family support system and children’s development and well-being. (Fantuzzo, LeBoeuf, Chen,  Rouse, & Culhane, 2012). As much as disruptive it is to be without our home, the uncertainty of life while raising two daughters, teaching, and working in graduate school caused enormous anxiety and worry.

Some who shared the last class with me may know that in late September a major leak occurred in my home. This leak flooded the third level, second level, and basement of my home. A water mitigation company came in and demolished large water soaked areas of my house. Because of the lack of walls and floors in many areas, my daughters and I were sent to a hotel. We attempted to gather what we needed, as I thought we would only be there a short time. I wasn’t sure how to proceed for many days, as the insurance company had to work on our “estimate.” Until then, I couldn’t plan for contractors to come in and begin the repair. I was devastated as I had just remodeled my kitchen. For the first few days, I thought I would be going on after a few days. Later I realized we would be without our home for months.

In the beginning of our time without our home, I suffered severe anxiety. I was worried about how I would get everything done while working, mothering, and being in graduate school. Life was truly hectic and chaotic. I didn’t manage anything well, and everything seemed to be a day late and a dollar short. I couldn’t focus on anything well. We moved back into our house last week and then left for New York City for Thanksgiving. Our house is still in boxes, and although we are home, nothing is in order. We are still playing catch-up.

While at the hotel, our normal mornings went from my girls walking 50 yards to their bus stop and me leaving the home just after that, to me getting my girls up early and dropping one child off at her school then taking my other daughter to my mother’s home so that she could take her to school at the regular time. I was stressed everyday as traffic can be brutal in DC, and my normal commute is 45 minutes, and these extra steps added to the time.

I had a bit of a breakdown at school one day and ended up crying in my principal’s office. I felt frustrated by a variety of issues, and it bubbled up and into tears at school.

Despite high levels of risk exposure, many children who experience family homelessness demonstrate competence across developmental domains, suggesting resilience (Herbers, Cutuli, Supkoff, Narayan, & Masten, 2014). This was the case for my daughters. Although I did a poor job of juggling everything on my plate, my daughter’s report cards were on par with what they had last year.

Homelessnesss is by far worse than our temporary situation. I can empathize with families going through struggles. I had the support of my family, boss, friends, and mainly my insurance company. For me there was an end in sight, for the homeless families there is no end in sight.